After attunements, I can't pleasure myself without headaches and more.

Well I started the road to attunement through free online processes a few months ago and one of the detox symptoms of massive headaches was a major issue with me. They went away but well, I don't generally do that but I decided to as it seemed weirdly weak and now everytime I do, I get those type of headaches and it kills it. Well actually a few weeks ago that is what it did. Now it doesn't get hard at all anymore, it is rather constantly limp and small, I have to sit to pee. The last time I tried I felt a great warmth of energy inside me behind that area I never felt before but nothing in the penis and I did orgasm I guess but felt nothing but that wamth inside, it was a good feeling but not the feeling I would have expected and I sometimes feel that energy when I'm not thinking about it. Perhaps if the two were joined. Anyways this is a weird one and I figure I would ask if this is common. I don't think about it so much but it has me worried a bit. I am a virgin with no significant other. Is this natures way of making me wait?

Yes I do. Can it be an issue with me and sex I haven't worked through? I don't really do that stuff that much, except on the odd occasion but you know it kind of use to get "happy" on its own and after noticing that it wasn't doing that anymore I developed a sort of academic curiosity, I'm not panicking though I am worried, in particular if ever the opportunity comes up to generally perform a sexual act with a woman I am deeply committed to, I would like to be able to please her. I am a virgin, I've never been on a date, a 32 year old virgin who has spent the majority of his life taking care of his ill relatives rather than living a social life, taking a job, having friends or a romantic interlude. Sexually, I am drawn to women though due to the oddity of my upbringing I feel closer to my feminine side than my masculine side. My screen name is my middle name, I am known by my first name which is a female name my mother gave to me when I was born and possibly affected the development of my personality.

I did my free Usui Reiki here:

http://learnreikinow.tripod.com/

I had previously paid a friend I met shortly after my parents dies, kind of my first friend, 1500 or so to teach me all levels but she never taught me and we had a fight and she said she never would teach it to me and she said she would never pay me the money back either. I really wanted the whole person to person interaction, the whole bells and the relationship but it seemed not to be. There is a part of me that thinks this friend might have put a curse on me though I love her truly and want to think she would not do so, the way she left things, it hurt but she did not have the love for me that I did for her. She is a practitioner of witchcraft, it is in her blood and she has spoken of having done such things before she found Reiki and she said she accidentally cursed someone within the last year or so. I would like to believe there is no such things as curses though the notion comes to mind, if it were possible, it would be the sort of thing she might would do unknowingly. She seemed so full of light when I first met her but she kept getting these bad headaches all of the time, her abilities were getting stifled, like her Chakras were shut off and from what I remember, her Reiki master had cancer and she was apparently sending negative or bad energy out to all of her students unknowingly and possibly this was to blame for some of my friends negative behavior though I think she had problems of her own. Regardless, I know she was being negatively affected by her Reiki Master and though she is not my Reiki Master she was suppose to be my Reiki Master and I did feel a lot of positive and negative energies when I was around her. When she was sick, I was sick. Shoot, everytime she had her period I would get cramps, bloat up and have headaches. I think we were somehow connected though I am not in contact with her and live in another state now.

So I have two things there that might be possible causes for this. My former friend, possibly sending negative energy out to me and my own sexual confusion or conflict of identity and naivety.